Setting Up a Power of Attorney Facts for You & Your Family

Your independence and autonomy are one of life’s greatest treasures, and the idea of that anything could change that can be scary. Setting up a power of attorney (POA) helps protect your independence by ensuring your wishes are honored if you’re ever unable to make decisions for yourself. While planning ahead can feel daunting, it’s a vital step toward providing peace of mind for you and your loved ones. With the right POA, you gain confidence that your future is in trusted hands, regardless of circumstances.

Think of a POA as a trusted teammate—a person who will act on your behalf during challenging times, ensuring your decisions and directions are carried out and your loved ones can focus on supporting you.

Choosing the right power of attorney is an important decision that should reflect your priorities and values. Take your time, gather information and select someone you trust to safeguard your independence and well-being.

Step 1: Know the Facts Before Setting Up a Power of Attorney

What is a Power of Attorney?

A power of attorney is a legal document that allows another person to act as an agent onyour behalf. This person can be authorized to pay your bills, manage your investments, make health care decisions and more for a limited or extended time.

How Does Power of Attorney Work?

You get to say what this person can do and under what circumstances they’re allowed to do it. If you ever change your mind, you can designate someone else.

Step 2: Start Setting Up a Power of Attorney

First, Know Your State’s Power of Attorney Laws

Before setting up a POA, it’s essential to have a clear understanding of its function. While POAs are recognized in every state, the specific rules and regulations governing them can vary. This means that the powers your chosen agent can exercise might differ depending on your location.

Choose a Power of Attorney

Decide what’s important to you. You will be asking someone to represent you in medical, legal and financial matters. Ask yourself:

• What religious, spiritual, or moral beliefs guide my life?
• Do I want my house and other assets to stay in the family or not?
• Who can carry out my end-of-life care with a clear conscience?

Find a family member or friend who shares your values and priorities. They can help you better because they understand your feelings and how you would react in various situations. This makes it easier for them to act in your best interest.

Their knowledge of your emotions and reactions allows them to provide more effective assistance. By knowing you well, they can make the choices that are most beneficial for you.

Who is the Right Person for the Job?

Your power of attorney will be making decisions and using your finances before your will takes effect. This person must be honest and someone you trust completely.

In all states, the person you appoint must be over 18 years of age. Most people choose a family member to help make decisions in their best interest. However, you can also pick a friend or someone neutral for this purpose.

6 Things to Look for in a POA

Ideally, the person you choose:

1. Lives near you. Managing health care and finances from afar is tricky. In emergencies, traveling consumes crucial time.
2. Has medical, financial and/or legal knowledge. If you don’t know anyone like that, can you depend on another person to reliably research issues or ask the advice of a competent professional?
3. Possesses common sense. In emotional situations, people are prone to make rash decisions. You’ll want to find somebody with the ability to keep a level head.
4. Is a good communicator. Your power of attorney must be able to advocate on your behalf.
5. Can make the time to carry out the duties. Your power of attorney will be juggling their personal responsibilities along with yours.
6. Stays organized. The more detail-oriented the person is, the better.

Step 3: Communicate Your Decision

The Power of Open Communication

The next crucial step is having open and honest conversations with the person you choose as your POA and with your loved ones. Be open and honest about your hopes, fears and any specific wishes you have for your future care. Using “I” statements can help express your feelings clearly, like: “I feel more secure knowing you’ll be there to handle things if needed.” Remember, clear and concise communication is essential. Here are some tips.

How to Ask Someone to be Your Power of Attorney

Now that you have someone in mind, ask if they’re willing and able to act as your power of attorney. Like all sensitive topics, approach the subject with empathy.

1. Explain that you’re planning for your future and are considering what your options are in case you are unable to make decisions for yourself.
2. Explain the responsibilities of a power of attorney.
3. Ask if they would be able to make financial, legal and/or health care decisions for you in case you are incapacitated.
4. Tell this person why you believe they could do the job successfully.
5. Reassure them that you will share important information so that if the time ever comes, they’ll know what to do.
6. If they agree, show your appreciation. If the person hesitates, ask them if they’re willing to learn more so they can make an informed decision. Offer to revisit the subject later.
7. Discuss how others may feel about your choice, and reinforce your reasons.

How to Tell Your Family

Setting up a power of attorney can lead to conflicts and test family dynamics. Old jealousies and resentments can surface and surprise you.

• Schedule a family meeting to discuss your decision and answer questions.
• Explain how setting up a power of attorney is intended to give everyone peace of mind.
• Give the reasons behind your choice of POA.
• Be empathetic. Listen and acknowledge their feelings and concerns without being defensive.
• Remember: No matter what anyone says or how anyone feels, you can listen with empathy without being obligated to change anything about your plans.
• If you’re not sure of what to say or are feeling too emotional, give yourself time to collect your thoughts.
• If the conversation becomes heated, revisit the topic later, when cooler heads prevail.

Need Help Setting Up a Power of Attorney?

You’ve got resources. An estate planner can walk you through the steps of setting up a power of attorney as well as medical advance directives, wills and trusts.

You don’t have to use a lawyer for setting up a power of attorney. Each state has a downloadable power of attorney form complete with instructions. Search online using power of attorney form and your state name as keywords.

Eldercare Locator is a government agency that can connect you to an information specialist.

Step 4: Check Setting Up a Power of Attorney Off Your To-do List

No one likes to think about the possibility of serious illness. Just the thought of it can lead to difficult family conversations. You can help family members deal with their fears and negative emotions through empathy and clear communication.

Having a trusted power of attorney in place gives you control even when you are not able to administer your financial and legal affairs or make your own medical decisions. Your agent plays a crucial role in your estate plan and offers you and your family the security of knowing someone will act on your behalf with your best interests at heart.